The Art of Surrender

Where have I been? In the lab cooking. Training and working is all I've been doing. Training is going very well, it's a constant battle between Coach G. and I everyday to see who comes out on top. He's managed to win a couple of days but I've won the rest. Coach is happy with the progress he is seeing and I'm excited with my progress thus far especially at this point in the season. I'm better in all aspects that coach has tested up to this point then I was at any point last season. I'm grateful for having a wonderful group of people that take care of my body as I push the limits everyday. They are keeping me injury free but more importantly they are allowing me not just survive the week of practice but to excel from week to week. We just finished our max testing in the weight room, I improved in 3 of the major lifts so now all I have to do is convert that weight room strength to my jumps.
The other aspect of my training that I've been focusing on is the mental part. Seeing my progress physically is easy but seeing my progress mentally only comes when I get to test it. I feel that I've made a lot of progress with the different mental aspects I want to prepare myself for this year. One of the biggest one was the fear of injury. After I fractured my tibia, it's been a constant battle to stay healthy so I can understood why I was cautious when I was jumping. I wanted to overcome that cautiousness because anyone that has triple jumped before knows you can't jump with caution. Triple jump takes guts and so I've been trying to block out my fear which in turn made me cautious. I've been practicing the "The art of surrender". I'm not afraid to admit that surrendering control is something that doesn't come easy for me. So because of my desire to be in control, I was trying to fix what I thought was broken with me, I was trying to control not thinking about re-injuring myself, control how I jumped so I can have less pain, basically anything I felt that could be controlled I tried to control it. Well as you can imagine that does not work very well. I'm sure we've all gone through a point where you avoid, ignore or run away from an issue only to find that it will not go away. The more you try  to push or block it out the more it seems to grow and gain mind share, it's a force that just won't go away.
Carl Jung explained this phenomenon when he said "What you resists persists". So the more I tried to fight thinking about my injury the more I thought about it, the more I tried to control everything the less control I had. So I've been practicing the art of surrender everyday. At practice I'm no longer trying to make the jump happen, I'm letting it happen. I'm no longer trying to ignore the fact that I could re-injure myself, I surrender to the fact that injury can happen so I stop wasting brain matter thinking I can control it. Knowing this and doing is it are completely different things, that is why I say I'm practicing the art of surrender, it has no finish line, it's put to the test everyday. I believe I've gotten the hang of it at least when it comes to athletics(I still need to work on giving up control in my personal life), don't resist just surrender. After I've surrender I just embrace what I was trying to resists and guess what,  it just disappears. It no longer occupies mental space in my head, so with all that extra space I'm able to fill my mind with positive images and thoughts.
I received external validation that this new mantra was working from my coach. Last week Coach asked me how work has been going and I told him same as usual, he responded by saying that he noticed a difference in my aura during evening sessions. I asked him what he meant and he explained that he could always tell whenever I've had a tough day at work because he could see my brain working all throughout practice, but lately he has not been able to tell, so he thought it might be because I was working less. I was happy to inform him that I wasn't getting lazy on him, I was still working the same schedule, but I've been practicing that art of surrender. After I explained what I meant he told me to keep it up. So I'm excited not only with my athletic progress but also my mental progress. The final phase to test the art of surrender is in competition. Things speed up at meets and you have less time to stop and fix what issues, so often time you revert to your comfort zone when things are going well. I haven't started competition yet  but I can't wait to test myself.  Not only that it will also give me a small break from weekend workouts :) Until then I will continue my practice of "The Art of Surrender", time to surrender to some sleep.

Haiti: Still Re-BUILDING

It’s been two years since the earthquake and Haiti is still rebuilding. I went back and forth on what and how I wanted to write a piece for the 2nd anniversary devastating January 12^th   earthquake,  finally I settled on writing something that would help to shed some light as to why Haiti is still rebuilding.  

Fact: The quake left countless evidence of its wrath behind. More than ¼ of a million people died, just as many injured and over 1 million people were left without a place to call home.  80% of Leogane was destroyed, big parts Port-au-Prince, Jacmel, and Petit-Goave were cleared out, and those are 4 of the biggest cities in Haiti. Countless infrastructure, schools, churches, hospitals, as well as administrative, residential and commercial buildings collapsed causing more damage to an already fragile and beaten country.

Let me be clear, there is plenty of blame to go around as to why Haiti is still in the state it’s in, but none, absolutely none of it falls on the shoulders of the over half a million people, who remain homeless and still live in tents. During all the efforts to rebuild they still have not be asked or been included in any rebuilding plans.

The whole world responded with pledges to help begin to rebuild. Ordinary people donated over $1.5 billion to the Red Cross and NGOs most of which were matched by governments. Close to $4 billion was pledged by international governments. But still 2 years later the country has not rebuilt any significant infrastructure, employment has not budged and basic needs such as food and shelter have not improved. The question in everyone’s mind remains, why? I’m not an expert nor do I have intimate knowledge of what goes on behind closed doors, but there are some basic truths that seem evident. If Haiti is going to rebuild, it is going to have be because of fundamental changes. The first one being, the Haitian people must be allowed to be part of their rebuilding. If construction is going to happen, then the major of the contracts and labor should be from the country itself and not outsources so that the economy can be stimulated and sustained. Proper allocation of funds must be given to social programs, such a schooling, healthcare and infrastructure being built. But I think the most important thing that needs to happen, foreign military presence especially that of UN peacekeeping forces needs to be drastically reduced.

Fact: According to an August 2010 report by the US Congressional Research Office of the overall $1.6 billion allocated for relief, $655 million was reimbursed to the Department of Defense; $220 million to Department of Health and Human Services to provide grants to individual US states to cover services for Haitian evacuees; $350 million to USAID disaster assistance; $150 million to the US Department of Agriculture for emergency food assistance; $15 million to the Department of Homeland Security for immigration fees, and so on. So you can see that most of the actually money never stayed or even got to Haiti.

Fact: According to a report by the UN Special Envoy for Haiti of the $2.4 billion in humanitarian funding, 34 percent was provided back to the donor’s own civil and military entities for disaster response, 28 percent was given to UN agencies and non-governmental agencies (NGOs) for specific UN projects, 26 percent was given to private contractors and other NGOs, 6 percent was provided as in-kind services to recipients, 5 percent to the international and national Red Cross societies, 1 percent was provided to the government of Haiti, four tenths of one percent of the funds went to Haitian NGOs. Again most the Haitian people didn’t see or feel the money, only 1% was allocated directly to the Haitian people.

The numbers are the same for almost all of the programs that were spear headed by foreign heads. I’m not blaming anyone, just shedding light that the people that need it most are still not getting the help the desperately need. How do we fix this, much like anything dealing with money, we need transparency and accountability. Once that is accomplished there needs to be swift action and enactment of a long term plan.

The earthquake destroyed homes, streets, communities, and lives and threatened to destroy the country, but like many times throughout our history Haiti would not succumb. Haiti maybe broken but it will never be destroyed. Does Haiti still need help? Absolutely, but the kind of help it needs is definitely not more military presence. The budget for UN peacekeeping in Haiti of $1 billion a year alone could go towards more worthy causes. I for one, think that you can’t maintain peace in a country, when you don’t speak the language of the people, let alone when you have a fully automatic weapon. That money could be used towards building schools, roads, sewer systems and other basic necessities. If the Haitian people that have been living in tents for the past two years were asked what they needed most, I’m sure the answer would not be more foreign people planning and talking about how to rebuild Haiti. Until the people that are actually affected by the earthquake are allowed to be part of the rebuilding, Haiti will remain in a state of ruin.

 None of this is easy, but it is necessary, it needs to be collaboration. For two years external consultants have been brought in to examine and figure out how to fix Haiti, well on the anniversary of the earthquake I have a radical idea, it’s time to listen. Time to listen to the people that have lived it and continue to live it, they will help steer the funding in the right direction. Two years later, Haiti still stands much in the same state it was the day following the earthquake. There has been much talk about rebuilding, yet there still has been very few actual “building” of anything. I do not consider the building of luxury homes an actual solution, when 80% of the population can't afford to live in them. Now it’s time to stop with the temporary band-aid solutions, it’s time for a permanent solution, true re-BUILDING. True re-BUILDING can only be achieved by involving the Haitian people, not discounting them as if they are ignorant of their own needs.

Is it really Tebow Magic?

I watch sports, I watch all kinds of sports. Championship season for any sport brings out the best in everyone. Watching the playoffs this weekend reminded me of why I love being an athlete. There is nothing better than watching people compete for something they worked so hard for. You have highly competitive athletes who work all year for a shot at holding that Lombardi trophy at the end of the season. Players that were playing injured, players that were playing with doubters, and players that were playing with high expectations. You just knew it wasn't going to be boring. It  definitely lived up to the billing, was the hobbled former champion going to bring his team back or was the chosen one going to bring his team to another unexpected upset when everyone lost faith in him. Well on this day Tebow quieted his doubters once again and pulled off another miracle. You know Hollywood is praying the Broncos make it to the Superbowl, I mean it would be the easiest scrip ever written. Hollywood likes easy but as an athlete I know a Steelers win would have been just as fitting for a Hollywood story in this battle. They had very real obstacles on their own to overcome but it just wasn’t as easy of a sell.

As an athlete I was not surprised that the Broncos won. I know firsthand how far self confidence and self belief can go. At the elite level physical dominance is minimal to success. Mental dominance on the other hand is a major part of success. So while on paper the Steelers looked like they had the upper hand the Broncos really had the mental upper hand. The Steelers were the ones with the high expectations, the ones that no one wanted to make excuses for, the ones that had the experience and the ones that couldn’t lose. You see as an athlete that is the equivalent of having everything to lose, if you win you were expected to win if you lose you failed. The Broncos on the other hand the Broncos were the ones that had nothing to prove, they were the ones that were expected to lose, and they were the ones that no one expected much from. As an athlete when you are the underdog you are below the radar no one is watching so all you have to do is work your butt off and give it all you’ve got, but the best effort you have because you got absolutely nothing to lose.

So was it Tebow magic, was it divine intervention? No it was simply a group of athletes who believed when no one else did that they deserved to win. You see Tebow believes in his faith, his teammates believe in his leadership, that is enough to give them the extra edge they needed today. Every athlete relishes the opportunity to prove doubters wrong. Spectators, commentators love to pick winners based on what’s on paper and what happened in the past. The problem, in sports history is not the best indicator. When you get to the top they tell you not to rest on your laurels. Have you ever wondered why? It’s because your success yesterday counts for very little in determining what success tomorrow. So all you athletes and non athletes take it as a lesson, you may fail 99 times but it doesn’t mean you will fail 100. By the same token you may succeed 99 times but it doesn't guarantee you will succeed 100. With belief in yourself, your abilities and most importantly your preparation you always have a chance to change the predetermined outcome. When everyone else counts you out count yourself in, you will surely find your own magic.

Please Use Proper Gym Etiquette

As part of my training I use the weight room quite a bit, but unfortunately with my hectic work schedule I usually have to use the local fitness club to do my weight session. Over the years I’ve noticed the need for a code of conduct for gym goers. Tonight I ran into a member that insists on wearing Speedos to lift (I wish I could take a picture) but believe it or not he is not even my concern. So in honor of Mr. Speedos I give you Pascale’s Gym code of Conduct.

-What the heck are you doing, better yet can you go do whatever it is somewhere else? Yes you, the one that picked the middle of the free weight section to bring a jump rope, Bosu ball and 30 pound curl bar to do some semblance of what might be a circuit. Although it’s entertaining for us to see you balance yourself on the ball then jump rope 20 times and use the curl bar to squat, we really don’t like to have to walk all the way around your nonsense to get to the dumbbells, pull bar or anything else that is on the other side of the room.

*Tip: At all gyms there is usually a section in the corner for stretching, abs, and non machine stuff please kindly use that to do your next fitness craze.

-Staring is not welcomed. Yes even at the gym you must follow the age old rule of thumb 1,2,3 look away. I’m flattered really, that you find me squatting, bench pressing, drinking water or anything that I might be doing so fascinating but please share the love and stare at others. Furthermore, when you see me catch you staring at me normally that is a good time to look away or better yet workout, which is after all what you are there for. If you’re so interested in what I’m doing wait till I’m finish and ask, really, I don’t mind as long as it will get you to stop perving on me. Yes I know the gym is the best place to find attractive people, what with all the sweat, wonderful scary and super attractive facial expressions people make while working out who could resist? But you must, fight the urge, all those people won’t disappear at once if you blink or look away.

*Tip: If you can’t resist then may I suggest you pick one of the stationary bikes closest to the exit. There you can stare at anyone and everyone that walks in and out of the gym for as long as you like, bonus you can even watch the TV with all the Spanish telenovelas that have some decent looking people. I know the people on TV don’t look half as good as the ones at the gym but please do us all a favor and try it out.

-You are not the mayor of the gym so leave everyone alone. I get you’re a friendly guy and you feel it’s your duty nay your right to make sure everyone at the gym is enjoying themselves but really dude you don’t even work there. I must have missed the hour on that day when you were elected official mayor of the gym so please excuse me if I’m out of line. When I’m stacking on weights please, please don’t come up to me and ask me if I need a spotter. 1 If I did I wouldn’t ask you, 2 you don’t even know what I’m about to do so step off. Another thing my personal space is about 3 feet if I know you but for you its 10 feet. But the most important thing to note Mr. mayor people that wear headphones don’t want to be disturbed, so go do your campaigning to people that make eye contact and are headphone free.

*Tip: Ever notice how everyone starts to power walk and put their head down when they see? Trust me it’s not them it’s you so your best bet it to go sit in the pool area and join the chatter bugs there.  

-Clean clothing and showers are not optional. Yes, I know you think I’m going to work out why should I shower, or worry about wearing something that didn’t come from the dirty laundry hamper? Well this may be news to you but you are not coming to your own personal gym. This is a COMMUNITY gym and as such you have other people that will probably be working out at the same time you are. It might seem like a waste of water to shower after a long day of work at the construction site just to get sweaty again but we are not facing that much water shortage. Believe me if we took a vote to either have you take a shower or for everyone in the gym to die of thirst unanimously we would sacrifice our lives for you. I’m not a genius but I can guess that the reason you put the clothes in the dirty basket is because they were dirty, so why would you think it putting them back on would be ok, especially since it’s what you wore last time to the gym.

*Tip: Since you seem to love that outfit so much just wash it after your workouts that way it’s clean the next time. We applaud your eco-friendly mindset for conserving water but just on this one issue be selfish, it’s for the greater good of the community. While you’re at it wipe down the machines after you finish.

- Where is your special shirt? Last time I checked the trainers at the gym all wore matching uniforms, so you must have left yours. I appreciate you wanting to help me with tips on what not to do like and what I should do but please don’t waste it on a non paying customer like me. You don’t even know what my goals are but yet you are convinced I should do rows instead of steps ups. Appreciate it but I’m cool, I’ll continue doing the wrong things. Just because you spend 30 minutes at the dumbbell station working on arms and shoulders, it doesn’t mean you’re a certified trainer. From where I’m standing the only advice I would take from you is how to get my neck to disappear into my traps and most importantly how to make my legs as thin as yours, its real slimming.

*Tip: Spend more time getting the rest of your body to pump instead of giving out free advice. We know the front desk is where to go ask for a trainer. You just continue walking around in those tight tank tops and people will come to you asking how you got so big. The best part when they come to you they might be willing to pay for your advice.

-The mirror is to check for correct form.  I sorry to be the one to inform you of this fact but it’s true. You may not have mirrors and all that lighting in your house but there are other ways to check yourself out for an hour. I would be fine with you hogging the mirror but I can’t get visual confirmation for some of my lifts.

*Tip: If you want to stare just go the bathrooms, they also have big mirrors and the lighting is much better there.

-Pool area may look like a private backyard but it’s still a workout area.  Some of you out there really think your membership makes the whole gym your personal hangout but it’s not. First thing before we get to the pool area please be considerate of others with the nudity in the locker rooms. Guys I don’t know how it is for you so I can’t speak on that. But Ladies I get your confident and proud of your body but is it really necessary for you to walk around naked with the towel on your shoulders? Ok maybe the towel is too small or it’s wet or it fell on the floor and it’s dirty then why do you need to blow dry your hair naked? Once we get to the pool area everyone just wants to talk, I risk my iPod getting water damage just so people won’t talk to me. Yes these abs are real, yes I work out a lot and yes I also watch what I eat so no more questions please. Oh if I'm in the cold whirlpool please jump in so you can splash cold water all over me.

*Tip: Nudity in the locker is only acceptable in short intervals, the time it takes to put your under garments on. If you want to just chat please kindly move to the part of the pool that’s not in anyone’s way. The cold whirlpool is not a pool it the whirl at the front of it should have been your clue so absolutely no diving please.

I hope you all found this public service announcement helpful so next time you’re at the gym everyone can have an enjoyable experience.

Allow me to introduce myself

I wanted to take this post to talk a little bit about myself for those that may not know me personally. I was born in France but I spent the early part of my childhood in Port-au-Prince Haiti. Our Family left for the US during civil unrest in 1991 and I’ve been here ever since. I come from a big family so loneliness is not something I’m familiar with. I have an older sister, older brother, 3 younger sisters and a younger brother.

I graduated Claremont High School (Wolfpack) after competing in cross country, volleyball, basketball and of course Track and Field. I was fortunate enough to earn a track scholarship to the University of Rhode Island (Rhody, Rhody Rhody… to all of my fellow Rams). While at URI I was plagued with injuries, I felt that factored heavily in limiting my development and ultimately success at the national level. I finished my college career with moderate success I won 5 Atlantic 10 conference individual event titles, our team captured 6 A-10 team conference championship, I was named most outstanding field performer for the conference in 2004, earned All-ECAC Honors, named athlete of the year for the University of Rhode Island, finalist for RI State athlete of the year for the NCAA 2004. So although I didn't reach the athletic goals I set for myself I was happy with what I was able to accomplish and most importantly earning a valuable education. I graduated with a dual degree in Electrical Engineering and French which allowed me to have a gratifying career as a Systems Engineer for one of the top technical companies around, Cisco Systems. I’m currently in my sixth year at Cisco loving everyday what I do.  I was actually during the start of my engineering career at Cisco in North Carolina that I scratch my track and field itch again.

I always felt like I there was more that I could achieve in the world of track and field, like I had unfinished business. So after a couple of years off the track but never out of the gym I was physically healthy and mentally hungry to return and give the track thing another go. When I was relocated to Los Angeles for work the first thing did was find a coach that I could train with. So in 2007 I asked a sprints and jump coaching legend, Dr. Ernest Gregoire who was working at Mt San Antonio College at the time if I can have a tryout to train with him. After a painful month he decided to keep me on and felt that we could make a push to qualify for the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games. I made a lot of progress leading up to the games and managed to qualify for Olympic trials, unfortunately it wasn’t my time to compete because a fracture in my tibia kept me as a spectator. Of course I was extremely disappointed but coach in his infinite wisdom told me I was young enough to have another shot. We have been working hard since then to earn another shot at the Olympic Games.

2012 is finally here and I am still in pursuit of my goal. I have a great team of people in my corner, who believe in me and what I can do. I am a better jumper than I ever was yet I’m still not the best jumper that I will be. I have plenty to look forward to this upcoming season. That was a quick intro to me and where I’ve been, stay tuned for where I’m going. Buckle your seat belts! It’s going to be an exciting ride!

New Year, Big Year!

Today officially kicks of the 2012 calendar year. 2012 is a leap year, an election year in the US and most importantly for me, an olympic year. When I began on my journey to compete at the London 2012 Olympic Games it seemed so far away, but now it's less than 213 days away. Join me on the final phases of preparation leading up to the games. I didn't make any resolutions or new plans for this year the only goal is to continue to work hard and execute everyday.